Aug
24

The $10 for Tuesday Project: “Letting my babies down”

By Kelsey

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My “Free Money” post, part of my $10 for Tuesday Project, has received over 60 comments. Everything from “Give me $10 or I’ll kill you” to, more often, tales that are a sign of these tough times.

It’s become much more of a responsibility than I ever imagined. To think someone was so desperate that they Googled “free money” and took the time to comment or email me their story hoping they might get a measly $10 breaks my heart. I always try to respond.

I received this note a while back:

My name is Michelle I am a 32 yr old single mom of 2. A 12 yr old lil girl and my 7yr old son Kevin who was diagnosed with a rare aggressive form of cancer called Rhabdomyopsarcoma. On June 19,2010 he is getting chemo and radiation. I am trying to raise 1500.00 to get a vehicle and my license so I can get him to his doctors appointments in Atlanta, Ga which is nearly 4 hours from our home in Valdosta, GA. We have to be in Atlanta twice a week and sometimes more. I am a waitress and it’s very hard to juggle all of this. I feel like I’m letting my babies down. But I’m trying. I would greatly appreciate it if you would please ask your family and church and anyone else you can think of to please pray for my Bo. His name is Kevin. Bo is his nickname. Thank you

“I’m letting my babies down.” That sentence levels me.

It’s not always easy to vet the stories to see if they are genuine. But after doing some digging and exchanging a few emails with Michelle I have no reason to believe that she isn’t telling the horrible truth.

This week I’m mailing my $10 to Michelle so she can help take care of her babies. I know that $10 won’t make that much of a difference, but more than anything I want her to know that there is someone out there that hears her. I would be honored if you joined me.

Email me at Kelsey@kelseytimmerman.com and I’ll send you her address.

(This is my second $10 for Tuesday today because I missed last week)

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Aug
24

The Poor Give More than the Rich

By Kelsey

If you had more, you would give less.

Americans earning less than $25,000 give away 4.2% of their income on average and those earning $75,000+ give away only 2.7% of theirs according to a piece by Judith Warner in the NY Times The Charitable Giving Divide.

Some of the most interesting parts of the story were Warner’s discussions with grad student, Paul Piff, about his research at UC Berkeley:

“…lower-income people were more generous, charitable, trusting and helpful to others than were those with more wealth. They were more attuned to the needs of others and more committed generally to the values of egalitarianism.

“Upper class” people, on the other hand, clung to values that “prioritized their own need.” And, he told me this week, “wealth seems to buffer people from attending to the needs of others.” Empathy and compassion appeared to be the key ingredients in the greater generosity of those with lower incomes. And these two traits proved to be in increasingly short supply as people moved up the income spectrum.

Piff found that if higher-income people were instructed to imagine themselves as lower class, they became more charitable. If they were primed by, say, watching a sympathy-eliciting video, they became more helpful to others — so much so, in fact, that the difference between their behavior and that of the low-income subjects disappeared. And fascinatingly, the inverse was true as well: when lower-income people were led to think of themselves as upper class, they actually became less altruistic.

Another interesting quote in the piece was from economist, Frank Levy:

“The welfare state rests on enlightened self-interest in which people can look at beneficiaries and reasonably say, ‘There but for the grace of God. . . .’ As income differences widen, this statement rings less true.”

“Runaway inequality (has led to) a pulling away of the very wealthy from the rest of American society. Do we believe the rich should be trusted to tithe, or should we have a society with a basic taxing-and-spending structure that ensures a modicum of economic security for all people?”

That last bit is the tie-in to the present day discussion on whether or not to roll back the Bush tax cuts. Personally, I’m all right with the “have’s” kicking in a little extra right now. There’s all this talk about if the wealthy have more money they’ll invest it and create jobs. That might be the case at times – and I do believe that giving someone a job gives them a dignity that no amount of charity ever could – but the folks who I know that still have money are sitting on it because the economy is still so uncertain. I don’t blame them.

Actually, I think the tie-in to the tax cuts in the piece is simply necessary to land it in the NY Times. The real story here is: More money = less empathy.

Don’t you just love humans and our short memories?

You give a poor person money and they care less. They forget the struggles they had. This is the whole “boot strap” argument. I did it by myself so you should do it by yourself.

There is no getting out of poverty by yourself or getting rich on your own. You can’t pull yourself up by the bootstraps if you don’t have any boots. At some point someone believes in you, whether it’s an employer or a client or an investor or a teacher.

The downside to financial independence is isolation. There’s more community in one apartment complex in the projects than there is in an entire development in the suburbs.

I work with a group in Muncie called Teamwork for Quality Living. They pair three middle and upper class volunteers, who are known as “allies,” with someone in the community who is trying to get out of poverty, known as “captains.” The allies don’t give the captains money, but they share their experiences, expertise, and connections in the community to help the captains reach their goals.

When the group meets as a whole, it’s hard to distinguish the captains from the allies, and, in fact, no one really tries. Two weeks ago when the group met we discussed what the allies and captains, alike, get out of the experience. Many of the allies talked about how they see the poor in a very different light now and the captains said the same thing about the wealthy.

It turns out zeroes in a bank account don’t mean as much as we think.

I guarantee that the members of Teamwork — captains and allies alike — give away much more than 4.2% of their incomes. It’s an investment that yields big returns in the form of friendship, confidence, faith in people, and empathy. And that’s something that no tax cut will ever do.

This Tuesday as part of my $10 for Tuesday project I’m giving $10 to Teamwork for Quality Living. I encourage you to find a group in your community to support with Time and/or moeny that breaks down the barriers between the have’s and have-nots and reminds us all that we’re in this mess together.

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Aug
10

$10 to the forgotten people of Bangladesh

By Kelsey

I was invited to speak to class in Indianapolis by John Clark, who runs a very cool organization called Provocate that seeks to connect Indianapolis to the world.

I was trying out some new material on being a glocal (think globally, act locally). The more I travel and the more I come into contact with extreme poverty, the more I realize that it is Bangladeshi’s that are the most capable of helping other Bangladeshi’s, just as it is Hoosiers who have to help other Hoosiers.

So now I donate money to organizations that I feel do a good job of supporting Bangladeshi’s helping other Bangladeshi’s. And where I’m a local – Muncie, Indiana – I’m donating time to fight poverty in my community.

I think that it’s important that each of us thinks about our place in the world and in our local community. I’ll hash these thoughts out more in a future post. This is something I really want to work into my new and improved “Where Am I Wearing?” presentation this fall.

Anyhow, during the Q&A after the talk someone posited, “Wouldn’t it be better for countries like Bangladesh if instead of traveling there you just donated the amount of money you would have spent and stay home?” I like the question. It kind of reminds me of this one that Wall Street Journal asked me. The audience turned a bit on the poor fella who was really just playing devil’s advocate and lobbing up a softball for me to knock out of the park.

I answered it similar to my answer in the Journal:

That’s misguided, says Kelsey Timmerman, a 28-year-old Muncie, Ind., scuba-diving instructor and author. If he’d never been to the Great Barrier Reef, he wouldn’t care as much that it is dying from rising ocean temperatures. Decisions he makes as a consumer and a voter offset emissions resulting from his travels, says Mr. Timmerman, who visited Bangladesh, Cambodia and China last year. “Travel helps us care more about our world.”

My answer was okay, but nowhere near the answer that came from the next hand that went up. Anwar Khan and his wife were planning a trip to Bangladesh with the intention of helping one family. They went and couldn’t do it. There was just too much suffering to help only one family. They founded OBAT Helpers an organization that gives hope to Pakistani refugees in Bangladesh.

Soon as Anwar told his story, I knew that some Tuesday in the very near future I would be giving OBAT $10. Today is that Tuesday. Here’s how to join me.

A letter from Anwar is below the break

Read more

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Aug
3

$10 for Tuesday: In support of wounded soldiers

By Kelsey
Captain Scott Smiley

Captain Scott Smiley

Leaving your family isn’t easy. I leave mine for a month or two at time. That’s a tough goodbye. Each time I’m faced with it, I think about the men and women of our military. They are gone for much longer and traveling to lands far less welcoming.

Returning home is always sweet. I return with my hair a bit longer, a few pounds missing, and some great stories. Annie usually cuts my hair within a few days, a couple weeks eating dessert puts the weight back on, and I stew over the stories making them readable. It takes next to no time for me to be back to normal.

But that’s not always the case for our soldiers.

They said goodbye. They went to war. Some of them returned injured.

I don’t know many soldiers. But I had the pleasure of meeting Scott Smiley who is one of a few blind active-duty soldiers. He was blinded in Iraq and is now a teacher at West Point. Scotty’s journey is recounted in his book Hope Unseen due out in September.

But sacrifices like Scotty’s are ones that I don’t think about enough.

Do you?

That’s why this Tuesday I’m sending my $10 to Team, Red, White, & Blue.

Team, Red, White, & Blue is a nonprofit that matches endurance athletes with wounded soldiers and their families. The athletes raise money that goes directly to the soldier. How cool is that?

Today it’s $10, but someday it will be buckets of sweat. I can’t wait.

Join me in Donating / Become a Fan of TRWB on Facebook.

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Jul
27

$10 for Tuesday: Samaritan’s Purse

By Kelsey

It’s not always easy giving. First it takes time.

Today I was flying back from 12 days in NYC and really didn’t have any idea of who I was going to give $10 to this Tuesday. I got home. I was tired. I was much more interested in playing with Harper and Oreo than staring at my computer. There was a chance that my $10 for Tuesday wouldn’t get posted until Wednesday.

And sometimes it takes a kick in the pants. Today that kick came from Michele Shaw:

Hi Kelsey! In the spirit of your Tuesday project, I have contributed for a month to Samaritan’s Purse. They do one of my favorite projects-Operation Christmas Child, and are already gearing up to help children around the world come December.

Giving is like anything else, you need a little support sometimes. So this Tuesday, along with Michele, I’m giving $10 to Samaritan’s Purse.

One thing I really like about their site is that you can choose what project you want to support.

Thanks Michele!

Anyone have any good ideas where to shoot my $10 next week?

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Jul
13

$10 for Tuesday: Homeless are Homeless

By Kelsey

It’s sort of funny when a big butter Jesus burns down – in fact, I drove by the site last week and it’s even funnier in person – but there’s nothing funny at all about a homeless shelter burning down.

No one wants to live in a homeless shelter.

I remember the scenes in Pursuit of Happyness where Will Smith and son are waiting in line for a bed at a homeless shelter in San Francisco. The father, Will, was looking down at the ground to avoid eye contact while simultaneously scanning out the side of his eye for anyone that might recognize him.

Making the decision to move into a shelter must be quite humbling.

But then to have the last place you would turn burn would really seem like life is kicking you while you’re down.

That’s why this Tuesday my $10 is going to the Muncie Mission homeless shelter, which recently had a fire. I gave to them earlier this year, but they need all of the help they can get right now. If you want to help, go here.

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Jun
29

$10 for Tuesday: Update

By Kelsey

I need to do a master page for the $10 for Tuesday project showing whom I’ve given to and more information explaining the project.

It’s been a pretty amazing experience for me so far. Everyday I get an email or a post from someone asking for $10 or from someone who his giving in their own way. A couple of days ago I received this note from Hannah Ford.

My husband and I do not have a lot of money but every Sunday we pick at least 5 different children in our churches (my husband is the organist for two churches)..from 1-5 dollars each..someday we will be able to do more..we set aside 20 dollars each week for this..love what you are during.

We can all do a little more. Thanks for sharing Hannah!

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Jun
29

$10 for Tuesday: Spirit of Soccer

By Kelsey

Every Tuesday I give $10 to an individual or group as part of the $10 for Tuesday (#ten4tues) project. If you have any suggestions please leave them in the comments or email me at Kelsey@kelseytimmerman.com.

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For a few weeks I actually gave a crap about soccer.

I think every game I watched had a goal that should have been allowed and wasn’t or was allowed and shouldn’t have been. At times it seemed a little like WWE wrestling. Still, the beauty of soccer is its simplicity.

I once played soccer on a sandbar in a remote village in Honduras (listen to my piece on the World Vision Report). Our goals were marked by wood shavings from a recently carved dugout canoe. That’s the beauty of soccer: all you need is a ball and a little creativity to mark a goal. After that all you need is your two feet.

Although, you can’t take your feet for granted. I learned this while I was in Cambodia with an Organization called Spirit of Soccer. They use soccer clinics to educate kids – now over 80,000 worldwide – about Explosive Remnants of War.

Scotty Lee, the group’s charismatic and hilarious, founder has expanded the program to Bosnia and Herzogovina, Kosovo, Moldova, Cambodia and Iraq.

Currently the SOS team is at the World Cup. As the world puts the beautiful game front and center, I thought now would be a great Tuesday to give SOS $10 for the great work they’re doing that I’ve seen first hand and the great work they’ll continue to do in the future.

I hope you’ll join me. Donate here.

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Jun
15

$10 for Tuesday: Suicide- The Ultimate Crisis

By Kelsey

The man across from me could’ve been any man.

He served me tea. We small talked and then he told me about how is son killed himself by jumping off the bridge in Limerick into the River Shannon. He recounted the days spent on the river searching for his son. He talked about the man who found his son and how he came to the funeral.

“And that’s not the end of it,” he said.

Three months after his son jumped in the river to his death, his wife did the same thing, leaving the man with five kids to raise.

We sat in the Limerick office of the Samaritans and talked for nearly two hours. The Samaritans operate in England and Ireland. “Samaritans provides confidential non-judgemental emotional support, 24 hours a day for people who are experiencing feelings of distress or despair, including those which could lead to suicide.”

For the past few months and into the foreseeable future, much of my time has been dedicated to the financial crisis, which seems like a pin prick compared to the bomb that was dropped on this man’s life a few years ago. If anyone should be mad at the world, it’s the man.

He broke down several times. But he cried the hardest when he was talking about how beautiful his first granddaughter is and how she pulled the family together. In fact, his family is closer than ever. They volunteer more. They value many things more than money.

“I think this (financial) crisis might be good for society. For us to get back to what’s important.”

Talking to the man was one of them most amazing experiences of my life. I felt that he had been through the fire and come out with this wisdom to share.

Tom with the Samaritans in Ireland and Patricia with Living Goods – an organization that supports family members of someone who died by suicide – made my day of interviews happen. It was a gift. For their support and for their great work, this Tuesday I’m donating $10 to the Samaritans.

Suicide shouldn’t be a taboo subject. Treating it as such only makes it worse on the families who had a love one die by suicide. That’s another thing, we should all know, don’t use “commit suicide.” People commit crimes. People die by suicide.

I would be honored if you joined me in donating to suicide support groups this week. Here are support groups by region in the US and here are groups worldwide.

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Jun
10

Thankful Home

By Kelsey

My buddy Tim Bete, former director of the Erma Bombeck writers workshop, who forever holds a special place in my heart for dragging his daughters through 10 inches of snow to my first ever reading, is editor of a cool new project – ThankfulHome.

Here’s how Tim describes ThankfulHome:

ThankfulHome.tv allows people to share their stories about housing issues by submitting short videos. Visitors to the site can share why they are thankful for their homes or talk about a difficult housing situation they’ve faced (e.g., homelessness, unsafe conditions.) By connecting people who have decent housing with those who don’t, ThankfulHome.tv hopes new innovative solutions to housing issues will emerge.

Having been away from my home for the past six weeks, I’m feeling very thankful for my home. Almost as thankful as this girl…

I did a similar thing in front of the mirror, except I was wearing Underoos.

Thankful for your home? Send a video into ThankfulHome.tv.

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Contact Kelsey hi@kelseytimmerman.com

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