Creepy bumper sticker of the day award

Ferrets are little children in fur coats
The car’s license plate: WOOZLE
Awww, wook at the wittle ferret…

Is Peyton Manning the Governor of Indiana? You decide…

The sweet stink of memories

This morning the smell of dew and skunk triggered the memory of a stinky encounter I had one morning jogging before high school.
I recounted the experience in a column... [Read this entry]

A thread in which my life is threatened…

Read my most recent death threat
This is only the second death threat I have received. Ever. The first one was in person.
If you held a gun to my... [Read this entry]

What’s your Wal-Mart ratio?

I live in Muncie, Indiana, a city of 70,000 and we have two Wal-Mart Supercenters. That makes our Wal-Mart ratio 35,000 to 1.
If you take into account Meijer... [Read this entry]

Oreo, the GalleyCat, exploited?

I’m Oreo’s writer. She is not my cat. The possession doesn’t flow that direction, unfortunately.
I scoop her poop. I pick her eye boogers. I put... [Read this entry]

High school ME

Remember high school YOU? The one that went to a Spanish Club meeting once, but once was enough to put it on your list of activities on your college... [Read this entry]

If this is true, how am I not gay?

This video shows commercials for 10 toys in the 80’s that might have “made you gay.” I was 4 for 10.
I had a wuzzle. I still remember... [Read this entry]

Misremembering the English language

I watched Roger Clemens testify before Congress. I laughed at him when he busted out “misremember” after “misremember”.
“That’s not even a word,” I said to the TV, talking... [Read this entry]

Sweatshop the Game

Does anyone remember the computer game Hot Dog stand in which you buy the hotdog, the buns, etc, and you see if you can make your little hot dog business... [Read this entry]