Adventures in Spam: Dead Dad = Win

Spam costume

It’s been awhile since I’ve done an “Adventures in Spam” piece. Here’s my last one. Anyhow, I received the following email below and thought I would take a break from writing for a few minutes to respond.

My Dear,

It is my pleasure to contact you for a business venture which I intend to establish in your country. Though I have not met with you before but I believe one has to risk confidence to succeed sometimes in life. There is this huge amount of Seven million Five Hundred Thousands U.S dollars ($7.500.000.00) which my late Father kept with a Fiduciary Fund Holder in Abidjan before his death.

Now, I have decided to invest this money in your country or anywhere safe enough outside Africa for security and political reasons. I want you to assist me claim and retrieve this fund from the Fiduciary Fund Holders and transfer it into your personal account in your country for investment purposes on these areas:

1). Telecommunication
2). the transport industry
3). Five star hotel

If you can be of any assistance to me I will be pleased to offer to you 20% of the total fund. I await your soonest response.

Respectfully yours,

Ms. Julien Kowan

MY RESPONSE

Bummer! Sorry to hear about your Dad.

That said…

The timing of your email is great! I lost my job and have to scavenge for food for my family. If I have to eat one more raccoon, I’ll barf. My daughter has taken a liking to blended earth worms.

My favorite thing about Abidjan is that it’s like the first country (note: It’s actually a city) that pops up on an alphabetic list of countries. How’s the weather there?

Let me know what I should do next.

Show me the money! No more raccoons for me!!!!

Kelsey

 
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papa says:

BEER Glass for Fathers Day, Customized Mug w/his youngsters
birth datesCup, Dad Gift, Papa, Grandpa, Grandad, New Dad,
1st Fathers Day.

Let your voice be heard!

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